Tuesday, November 8: Election Day or Whatever
Finally, the sweet release from these damn election text messages
Today is election day in the United States. To call them free and fair elections would be something of an overstatement. There are many awful candidates running for positions they are certainly unqualified for, and maybe a handful of decent candidates mixed in. People will stand in line (sometimes for hours) to cast a vote, often for a candidate they don’t actively support. In this society, it seems more important to vote in order to avoid having the wrong devil in power.
If tonight goes well for a certain party affiliation, some things are likely to change. The republicans would love to try to cut spending on federal programs like health care, social security, and weapons for Ukraine. On the flip side, democrats would love to find new excuses for why tax increases on the wealthy are impossible and tax credits for families with children needs more means testing.
The impartial manchild new owner of Twitter logged on yesterday to advise users to vote for Republicans, because “shared power curbs the worst excesses of both parties”. If this were true then shouldn’t Elon Musk be endorsing union activity everywhere he can? Tonight’s results may take hours, days, or even weeks to verify and finalize. Here’s hoping for a not-so-distant future with elections that are actually free and fair.
Side Items
Help Me Purchase Liverpool: In a surprise turn, Fenway Sports Group (FSG), the majority owners of Liverpool FC, announced yesterday their intention to seek out new ownership for the club. 12 years ago FSG bought into the club for a mere $300million, and in that time they’ve seen their investment swell in value to approximately $4billion. In all likelihood the next owner will be some oil baron billionaire, or worse yet, Elon Musk decides Twitter isn’t enough. My offer: ~$500
World Cup Coverage: Today we’ll look at two African powerhouses looking for their first taste of World Cup success:
Cameroon: The Cameroonians were drawn in a group alongside Brazil (perennial challengers), Switzerland (just looking to stay neutral and have a good time), and Serbia, a surprisingly feisty addition to the tournament. Cameroon will rely heavily on Bayern’s Eric Maxim Choupo-Moting to finish their chances and carry the Indomitable Lions (actual team name) through to the knockout rounds
Ghana: This team boasts arguably the coolest name in the tournament (The Black Stars), and the roster features top league talent like Arsenal’s Thomas Partey, Mohammed Kudus of Ajax, and Tariq Lamptey of Brighton. Sadly, the Ghanaians have been drawn into Group H alongside Portugal, Uruguay, and South Korea. Portugal will be desperate to survive the group stages in what may be Cristiano Ronaldo’s final World Cup. Uruguay are coming in with an excess of talent at every position. Even South Korea will be a tough out. The Black Stars certainly have their work cut out for them, but don’t be surprised if they make a deep run this year
Daylight Savings: It’s like the people in power made a deal with the devil where we get one (1) extra hour of sleep for one night in exchange for it being midnight by 7pm every day for the next four months. Worst deal imaginable