Side Items
Egyptian/Israeli Skirmish: A man shot and killed three Israeli soldiers, proud defenders of apartheid, in a rare incident on the Sinai border with Egypt. Two IDF soldiers were killed early Saturday morning at a military outpost in the desert separating Israel from Egypt’s Sinai Peninsula. The assailant was eventually identified by the Israeli military as a member of the Egyptian border police. King Scumbag/Israel’s prime minister, Benny Netanyahu, called the killings a terrorist attack, saying, “Israel relayed a clear message to the Egyptian government. We expect that the joint investigation will be exhaustive and thorough.” How convenient that this investigation should be thorough while we continue to search for the murderer of Shireen Abu-Akleh
Soccer News: Manchesters City continued to dominate the English Premier League yesterday, as they beat their crosstown rivals Manchester United in the FA Cup final yesterday 2 - 1. Both of City’s goals were scored by the silent German assassin Ilkay Gundogan, including one in the game’s opening 15 seconds! This brings City one step closer to their first treble (a season in which a team is SO dominant, they win 3 trophies from 3 different competitions). I’ll be honest, it’s reaching a point where their success is inevitable, it’s no longer as fun to witness, particularly as a Liverpool fan
Other Soccer News: Karim Benzema, the reigning Ballon D’or winner and Real Madrid’s most decorated player, has decided to abandon one of the greatest teams in the world to join the Saudi Arabian pro league. If you’re thinking to yourself, “man, they must’ve paid him something ridiculous”, you are correct sir or madam. Reports indicate that Benzema was offered a two-year contract worth €400 million (that’s about $200 million per season) to move to Saudi Arabia. The sports-washing of a blood-soaked, oil-drunk regime continues. Soon we’ll find out if Messi is making the same mistake