Sunday, December 11: Dima Maghreb
A lil somethin to snack on, but don't go spoiling your appetito
Side Items
Billion Dollar Juul Settlement: The predatory company that led to a teenage craze has settled more than 5,000 lawsuits over the addictive product that allows users to look like they’re sucking on a flash drive. The company announced hundreds of layoffs last month and bankruptcy appears increasingly likely as it secured financing to continue operations. Great news for those foolish enough to have fallen into the Juul trap
Biden on MBS: When it comes to holding foreign leaders accountable, the “leader of the free world” is just as toothless as you might imagine an 80-year old to be. Hatice Cengiz, the fiance of assassinated journalist Jamal Khashoggi, filed a lawsuit against the murderous Saudi leader, who may or may not have (but definitely did) order the murder and dismemberment of the journalist. Earlier this week, District Judge John Bates said that he was reluctant to throw out the lawsuit but had no choice given the Biden administration’s decision to grant immunity to the crown prince. Awesome
Power Grid Attack in NC: Tens of thousands of people in rural North Carolina were without power earlier this week after two power stations were damaged by targeted gunfire. There are unconfirmed reports that this attack was in direct retaliation to a scheduled local drag show that angered some residents, which is as absurd as it is believable. This also ushers in a new form of terrorism, wherein our public utilities are under threat by those who may disagree with us politically
World Cup Recap
The Atlas Lions March On: Unbelievable, incredible, astonishing, generational. Just a few words to describe the result that few would have been bold enough to predict. Morocco beat Portugal 1-0 in the quarterfinals, sending Cristiano Ronaldo home in tears and bringing joy to millions across the Middle East and North Africa. The Moroccan’s became the first African team to progress to the World Cup semifinal, and they did it convincingly. They say Pan-Arabism is dead, but Abdel-Nasser himself would be proud of this team, uniting people across borders and boundaries. Here in Jordan, the streets were filled with vendors selling Moroccan flags and the final whistle was cause for celebration, prompting grown men to dance like shameless children. I’ll be honest, I hugged a stranger, but we weren’t strangers any longer. Together we witnessed history, and together, this Moroccan team has brought hope and pride to a region unfamiliar with this kind of success.
It’s (England) Coming Home: I really shouldn’t get this much pleasure out of another team’s misfortune, but they make it so damn easy. England came up short against the French, losing 2-1 after English captain Harry Kane absolutely SKIED a late penalty that could’ve tied things up. Rumor has it the ball is currently orbiting Saturn after leaving Earth’s atmosphere around the 84th minute of the match. The French now face Morocco on Wednesday night, with many* hoping for a revenge fantasy against the colonizers
*it’s me, I’m many